| Author | Message | ||
     Court |
For better than 12 years, I have maintained that I am largely a victim of my association with motorcycles. The people who ride them, the venues and even the mean ol' bikes themselves have, both in concert and in solitary efforts, conspired to steepen my life's slope. The tagline "no good deed goes unpunished" has moved from written form to a marching mantra, thanks you to folks. Yet, I go on. Described, just yesterday as I related the event I am about to share with you, by Road Thing as "one obsesses with the awesome responsibility of my cultural stewardship" I steadfastly maintain my course to right wrongs and guide mankind's good like a mariner would follow a star. Sometimes this doesn't work out so well for me. Yesterday, call it about 3:30PM, I am driving South down New York City's FDR Drive, it's a gorgeous day and "Axis Bold as Love" is sealed in the cabin of the sidewalk assault vehicle at the 120dBA level. Life is good. Lulled, by sunshine and anticipation of the coming weekend, I was in a fog like daze when I saw it. In a flash, I spied, between 4 lanes North and 4 lanes South, smack dab in the middle of the FDR a man dancing. Yeeeeeeeeegads. I am from Kansas. Dancing, until recently, was considered vile and something good people don't do in public view, we never danced on I-70. You can surely appreciate my amazement as this man, silhouetted by the bright sunshine, danced away. In a rare NYC moment, I was actually moving in traffic so my "on target time" was quite limited. Nonetheless I felt the need to act. Act? . . . well, yes. But, first I had a dilemma. NYC, with millions of 911 calls a year, has a "311" system for calls that are important, yet lacking the urgency of "we've got a jumper" situations. I opted to call 3-1-1. "New York City helpline, this is Cherise, how may I help you?" "I'd like to report a man dancing the middle of the FDR" "What's the nature of the emergency sir?" "Well, he's a crappy dancer?" Cherise lost it laughing and I saw my chance. "Look Cherise, we're vying for the 2012 Olympics, we've staked the future of this rock the Indians were talked out of on a stadium, a jazz concert facility and renovating Carnegie Hall. We are the cultural center of the world. You think we need crummy dancer in full public view? "I'm forwarding your call to 9-1-1, please stay on the line, I'll speak first" "New York City Emergency, what is the emergency?" "This is Cherise at 3-1-1, call sequence is 763492 and the caller ID is 917.xxx.xxx. Standby for the caller" "Yes, caller what is the emergency?" "I'm reporting a man dancing in the middle of the FDR. Cherise and I discussed it and felt that you'd like to know about a crummy dancer". Cherise: "That's not what I said" Court: "Well, it was implied when you saw fit to bring in the feds" 9-1-1: "Sir, he is *IN* the FDR or near it?" Court: "Smack dab in the middle about 38th street, up on the concrete raised median in the middle. Not a tune to be heard, yet this vagrant is throwing down steps. Could be drugs involved, better bring back-up" 9-1-1: "Sir, our officers will make that decision. Can you describe him?" Court: "Sure. He looks like Smokey Robinson when he did that gig at the Palace Theatre in 1978". 9-1-1: "Who is Smokey Robinson?" Court: "That's cold. You're not from here are you? You're not from cultural mecca?" 9-1-1: "Okay, then what was this "Smokey" guy wearing?" Court: "That it. I'm not answering anymore questions until you apologize for dissing Smokey Robinson" 9-1-1: "Okay, how do we find him? Court: "He's a large black man, wearing a green Army jacket and he's shakin' like a hurricane." 9-1-1: "What?" Court: "Trust me, there are damn few folks dancing in the middle of the FDR, tell Kojak to look for the only one". That was the end of the call and I sensed it had gone poorly. Somehow, in my effort to do good and advance the cause of mankind, I'd discovered that not all had the cultural undercurrent that I felt duty bound to pass on. Again, I was looking like the victim of my very own good intentions. I get home, flop down in the chair and begin to sulk as I relate the tale of my thwarted "cultural stewardship" to my Spousal Control Unit. I'm still in the chair...about to doze off, when I hear the scream....."Get in the kitchen". I race in just in time to see News Copter 4 at the screen of an accident on the FDR.
I am a victim. Court | ||
| Blake |
 I did NOT see that coming. That's absolutely great! Have a wonderful weekend! hehehehehehe | ||
| Peter |
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| Dino |
First, let me say, absolutely hilarious. Now, a question. Court - aren't you our resident high voltage expert? Shouldn't you have immediately recognized the "Reddy Kilowatt Shuffle". Did he really favor Smokey, or was he just ... smoking, so to speak? Enquiring minds want to know. ps - Reddy Kilowatt was, at one time, the corporate mascot of Pacific Gas & Electric Co. I didn't make him up...honest. | ||
| Road_thing |
I remember Reddy Kilowatt... Great work, Court! We've got a dancing vagrant named "Spiderman" down here in Houston, maybe I'll sic the Feds on him, too... rt | ||
| U4euh |
Too funny & ironic at the same time. Call Cherise up and ride her a bit. | ||
| Court |
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| Pilot |
9-1-1: "Who is Smokey Robinson?" Can we have a picture of him also to inform the less cultured? | ||
| Reinhart |
Motown star Smokey Robinson the "poet laureate of soul music' has been composing and singing rhythm and blues hits for more than 30 years. 1986 inducted into the Rock & Roll hall of Fame,and in 1989 he was named a Grammy living Legend...Smokey Robinson and the Miracles......the tracks of my tears..second hand emotion..going to a go go...the tears of a clown...etc.  | ||
| Jerseyguy |
Ah yes Smokey Robinson & the Miracles. I just had a flashback to a moment riding home on the Somerville High freshman football team bus. We had just completed an undefeated season and I was singing "The Tracks of my Tears" along with my black team mates (we were allowed to call them "black" then). As we jubilantly stepped off the bus we were told that President Kennedy had been shot in Texas.... | ||
| Davegess |
Smokey may be famous for all those hit songs he did with the Miracles but he also continues to produce most of the Motown records. He wrote and produce lots of the Motown hits over the years, his personal recordings are only the tip of the iceberg. | ||
| Nedwreck |
Ol' Reddy was also the mascot of Mississippi Power and Light(now Entergy). Bob |
