| Author | Message | ||
     Danger_dave |
1. You know the meaning of the word 'girt'. 2. You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn. 3. You think it's normal to have a leader called Kevin. 4. You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse. 5. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden. 6. You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son's pencil case when he first attends school. 7. When you hear that an American 'roots for his team' you wonder how often and with whom. 8. You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds. 9. You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin'. 10. You pronounce Penrith as 'Pen-riff'. 11. You believe the 'l' in the word 'Australia' is optional. 12. You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.' 13. You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, pineapples. prawns and sheep. 14. You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'. 15. You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place. 16. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife. 17. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin. 18. You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'. 19. You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast spread. 20. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis. 21. Hamburger. Beetroot. Of course. 22. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again. 23. You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year. 24. You still don't get why the 'Labor' in 'Australian Labor Party' is not spelt with a 'u'. 25. You wear ugh boots outside the house. 26. You believe, as an article of faith, that every important discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off to the Yanks for a pittance. 27. You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them. 28. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language. 29. You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is always polite. 30. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose. 31. You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'. 32. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle. 33. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket. 34. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'. 35. You still think of Kylie as 'that girl off Neighbours'. 36. When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit. 37. You believe the phrase 'smart casual' refers to a pair of black tracky-daks, suitably laundered. 38. You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction. 39. When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer. 40. You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second. 41. You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's new test for migrants. 42. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says 'cobber'. 43. And you will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand. | ||
| Crusty |
19. You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast spread. Is THAT where Vegemite comes from? | ||
| Danger_dave |
nobody asks that question. | ||
| Birdy |
Somethings are better left unknown, Dave? | ||
| Danger_dave |
That's one of 'em. | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
6. Course it is. 23. that's not an article of faith, it's TRUE!!! 26. Nearly true. 35. Isn't she?? | ||
| Spdkls |
i thought number 1. was to hate paul hogan for the whole crocodile dundee thing...lol or did i strike a nerve  | ||
| Cmhxb9 |
Dave, please define 'girt' for us Buckeyes. | ||
| Cityxslicker |
Looks like I will have to winter over one of these years, see if I cant shake that Yankee Tourist stamp | ||
| Djkaplan |
Wow... I can't even understand what most of the reasons I might be Australian are. I guess I'm not one... but I kinda knew that already. | ||
| Danger_dave |
Croc rocked - that's not a knife! Girt is somewhere in the National anthem. Not sure what it means  | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Means "surrounded by" ya moth eaten galah! | ||
| Ferrisbuellersdayoff |
Man and I thought living in the South of the US meant we had alot of funny sounding slang. DD; I forwarded that to a friend of mine. He and his twin brother are from...crap now I dont remember. They'd disagree about the Croc Dundee thing. I pulled the knife line on them once and got a good lecture about how only fools carry knives in the bush, as I got a glimpse of what looked like a Python .460 with a pearl handle. | ||
| Danger_dave |
They have four teeth between them? ;-P I'd say they would be typical of a small % of the population. It was the most popular movie ever for a while. I've also not lived in the Gulf country, but apart from up there - you can deal to the native fauna with a rock and a stick. You sure they aren't winding you up. I take it a python is a hand gun? I think that ownership of such a weapon is worth jail time in some states - unless its special circumstances - no expert on such matters though. (Message edited by danger_dave on February 26, 2008) | ||
| Danger_dave |
It's his comedy show that hasn't stood the test of time very well: | ||
| Blublak |
Dave.. Python in a model of revolver made by the Colt company. Traditionally a very high quality and reliable bit of kit and normally chambered to handle high power loadings. As for guns being against the law in certain jurisdiction.. yes, that's correct, but then again, isn't it that way not far from you? Don't know about New Zealand law but I thought I'd read that Austrailia had all but outlawed private ownership of firearms. | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Dave, you forgot about this. | ||
| Danger_dave |
I had a GS850. I'm still trying to forget that too. | ||
| Danger_dave |
>>Don't know about New Zealand law but I thought I'd read that Austrailia had all but outlawed private ownership of firearms.<< Yeah - the big gun buy back happened just before I emigrated to NZ. After the nutter shot 36 people at Port Arthur the Govt said 'that's it - no more guns' they paid owners compensation and destroyed the lot in a crusher. I've had lots of conversations about it and how US circumstance is different. But in the end happily we haven't had a mass shooting since. As for NZ. There are still gun and ammo retailers about. No handguns or automatic weapons I think. Dunno - never needed one. |
