| Author | Message | ||
     Sportyeric |
This is going to be a multimedia extravaganza! You'll have to download the music from Napster or somewhere 'cause I'm busy thinking up the story. Then play it while you read the story real slow. The Soundtrack: Oh Canada. Up Where We Belong (J. Warren & J. Cocker). Stay With Me (R. Stewart) Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini. One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer. (G. Thorogood). Listen to the Rythym of the Falling Rain. Morning Has Broken (C. Stevens) Let the Sun Shine (5th Dimension. Come Together (Beatles) The Boys are Back in Town (Thin Lizzy) Working Man, I Am (R. McNeil) One Bourbon, One Scotch again. Stairway to Heaven. These are a Few of my Favorite Things. The Long and Winding Road. Convoy (C.W. McCall) Feelin' Alright, (J. Cocker). Shakin' All Over (Guess Who). Good Vibrations (Beach Boys). Crazy (P. Kline).Breakdown (T. Petty). Truckin' (Grateful Dead). Back in the Saddle Again (G. Autry).Take the Long Way Home (Supertramp).The Sportster Song (Sportyeric) Turn Around (Bonnie Tyler). Rocky Mountain High (John Denver) With a Little Help From My Friends, (Joe Cocker). Take It Easy (Eagles). Crosstown Traffic (Jimi Hendrix). Home Again (Pink Floyd). Good Hearted Woman (Willie Nelson) What a Wonderful World. The Story: Our story begins with a timing problem (not ignition, mine is spot on!). With Mrs. Sportyeric getting party supplies in the cage, local friend Jim coming over to help consume them, and Frank, Stephanie, Bill and Sue coming up from Oregon to be the party, I worked feverishly to reassemble the old scoot. Getting kinda bald, gotta broken tooth, still got character but losing vigor, nuts often loose, can't get it up too well anymore. Thank goodness I have a bitchin' bike to make up for my other shortcomings. So Frank calls to ask for an escort, as its dark and raining. No problemo, but I'm not gonna sit at the highway interchange when we can meet in an easily found bar, right at the border crossing. Work out the math: Bellingham to the border- 40 min. (Don't Interupt! That's part of the story!) Waiting to cross- 30 min. (Indy race and major golf tourney). 8 o'clock now, I'll meet you at 9:15 at the Tudor Inn. Figure if Jim doesn't show soon, I'll call him on his cell. And then it all falls apart. 9:30, still no Jim. Leave a note. Door's open. Beer's in the fridge. Get to the Tudor by 10pm and realize (remember?) that it has LIVE ENTERTAINMENT and I don't mean a band! Inside, it gets worse fast. Bellingham is only 20 min. from the border and there was no line-up so Frank, Bill, and the LADIES have had time for three shows, a break, and now the first one's coming back! Steph tells me that one (Ms. Indy) had a costume with a checkered flag motif that Frank wanted her to leave on! My protestations of ignorance are not believed. Never been there except at the beginning of a ride, around noon. Everyone later says that they have peelers at noon, too. I guess I'm usually just so intent on talking bikes that I don't notice the entertainment. That's not to say that I never do. I know the Fraser Arms had two girls covered in Mazola oil making slides of each other, and another peeler bar on the Pitt River had a girl named Harley who did tricks with oops. Never mind. Anyway, we finished the drinks, searched quickly and unsuccessfully for a motel for Bill and Sue, (Couldn't find one sanitary enough to take your leathers off), and got home in time to miss Jim by five minutes. All the more beer for the rest of us, you might think. But I'd just bottled 50 litres of Extra Special Bitter, so supplies were good. Ah well. Good company, good time. Goodnight. | ||
| Anonymous |
Napster dosn't list "The Sportster Song." Where can I find it? | ||
| Sportyeric |
Well anon, I'm glad you asked. It's a little tune I composed on my way back from a Harley event where, as usual, everyone was asking when I was going to get a real bike. It goes like this: Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Harley Big Twin. My friends all ride Sportsters, just like women. I need a real cycle so I can fit in. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Harley Big Twin. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Dyna Wide-Glide. Styling and comfort. Man that's a ride! Cruise down to Starbucks and park it outside. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Dyna Wide-Glide. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Heritage Soft-tail. I'm counting on you, Lord. Please don't you fail. I need a motorcycle as big as a whale. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Heritage Soft-tail. Oh Lord, won't you buy me an old Shovelhead. Hard-tail, ape-hangers, tombstone, deaths-head. Can't do no corners. Do burn-outs instead. Oh Lord, won't you buy me an old Shovelhead. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a stroker FX Eighty-nine inches. That's better than sex. Just can't afford one because of my ex. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a stroker FX> Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Sportster XL Searching for twisties, riding like Hell. Out-runs the Big Ones but they'll never tell. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Sportster XL. (Buell Content) Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Lightning S1. Carving through canyons. Out having fun. Can't get to Sturgis. Too hard on the buns. Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Lightning S1. | ||
| Davet |
To really appreciate that tune, you need to hear Eric sing it out loud in a Lillooet pub!! | ||
| Sportyeric |
A haiku: The Duffy Lake Road, Wonderful friends gathering Season's end draws near. | ||
| Anonymous |
What's a haiku, Sportyeric? | ||
| Sportyeric |
A haiku is a traditional form of Japanese poetry, although it doesn't rhyme. It is characterized by a pattern of syllables: 5, then 7, then 5. It should evoke a season, as the above does, but as it becomes popular in the west that is becoming less necessary, for example, a computer haiku: First snow, then silence This thousand dollar screen dies So beautifully. People write haikus about many things, for instance, Spam, the sandwich meat: Ears, snouts and innards A homogenous mass. Pass another slice. or: Pink beefy temptress I can no longer remain Vegetarian. I cannot claim credit for these. I'm only using them as examples to encourage you all to contribute your haiku about Border Raid. | ||
| Eeeeek |
What are you saying? I can just type random words And it's poetry?  Vik | ||
| Blake |
That's the idea dude. To be appreciated, Add witty humor. | ||
| Sportyeric |
Sophistication! That's what this board was needing! Everything's fine now. | ||
| Sportyeric |
It's often been said That Frank must have a screw loose. Turns out it was nuts. |
