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Newfie_buell
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 01:51 pm: |
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Newfoundland Declares War on USA President George Bush was in the Oval Office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang. "Hallo, President Bush" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Archie, up 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove, Newfoundland, Canada ey? I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on ey!" "Well Archie," George replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?" "Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is myself, me cousin Guihan, me next-door-neighbour Mick, and the whole dart team from the pub. That makes eight!" George paused. "I must tell you Archie that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command." "Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back!" Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!" "And what equipment would that be Archie?" George asked. "Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm tractor." "Did I mention that we have access to a Buell Motorcycle as well!!!!" President Bush sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke." "Lard T'underin' Jaysus, bye", said Archie, I'll be getting back to ya. "Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "President Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four fellas from the Legion have joined us as well!" George was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!" "Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie "I'll have ta call youse back. "Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President Bush! I am sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere war." "I'm sorry to hear that" said George. "Why the sudden change of heart?" "Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can feed two million prisoners." |
Blackbelt
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 01:58 pm: |
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nice... only a newfoundlander could think of something like that... |
M1combat
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 02:00 pm: |
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ROTFLMAO! |
Ezblast
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 02:17 pm: |
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BRAVO! GT - JBOTDS! EZ |
Spiderman
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 02:33 pm: |
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Access to a Buell Motorcycle LMAO. Now Dyna will insert joke about gernading LOL |
M1combat
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 03:02 pm: |
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VROOOOMMMM!!! FOR THE CAUSE!!!! BOOOOOM!!!! |
M1combat
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 03:02 pm: |
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"Well, he made a smoke screen for us anyway... CHARGE!!!" |
Glitch
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 03:26 pm: |
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Lard T'underin' Jaysus |
Ezblast
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 03:34 pm: |
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I dunno but I think the reason they would all surender as prisoners would be for the free beer? - yea thats the ticket ! yea! GT - JBOTDS! EZ |
Spiderman
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 04:11 pm: |
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I will be the first to go after their Screech supplies, who's with me?!?! CHARGE!! Spidey's famous last words... "Give me screech or give me death!" |
Crusty
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 04:16 pm: |
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quote:Spidey's famous last words... "Give me screech or give me death!"
Is there a difference? |
Aesquire
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 04:35 pm: |
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Why does this remind me of the scene in "Braveheart" when Wallace says "I'm going to go pick a fight" ???? |
Newfie_buell
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 06:04 pm: |
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Spidey & Crusty, Time is flying me brudders!!!!!! Gonna be a good time!!!! |
Newfie_buell
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 06:07 pm: |
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Spidey & Crusty, Time is flying me brudders!!!!!! Gonna be a good time!!!! |
Clydeglide
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 06:22 pm: |
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"Lard T'underin' Jaysus, bye", Y'arnt related to me old Aunt Ethel, From Lark Harbor and Sydney er ya! Damn, you brought back a few memories. Thanks Newfie |
Crusty
| Posted on Friday, April 09, 2004 - 09:56 pm: |
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quote:Gonna be a good time!!!!
You bet your sweet Bippy! |
Newfie_buell
| Posted on Saturday, April 10, 2004 - 12:48 pm: |
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Leave my Bippy out of this!!!!! Whats a Bippy anyway? |
Mr_grumpy
| Posted on Saturday, April 10, 2004 - 06:12 pm: |
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Who's not been watching reruns of Rowan & Martin's laugh in. |
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