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Old_man
| Posted on Wednesday, May 23, 2007 - 10:01 pm: |
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> Original Hollywood Squares... > > If you remember the > > Original Hollywood Squares > > and its comics. > > These questions and answers are from the days > > when "Hollywood Squares"game show responses > > > > were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. > > > > Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions. > > > > Q. Do female frogs croak? > A. Paul Lynde : > > If you hold their little heads > > under water long enough. > > > > > > Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, > > at least how high should you be? > A. Charley Weaver (aka Clifford Arquette ): > > Three days of steady drinking should do it. > > > > > > Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. > A. George Gobel: > > Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. > > > > > > Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. > > Are you probably a man or a woman? > A. Don Knotts : > > That's what's been keeping me awake. > > > > > > Q. According to Cosmopolitan, > > if you meet a stranger at a party and you think > > that he is attractive, is it okay to come out > > and ask him if he's married? > A. Rose Marie : > > No; wait until morning. > > > > > > Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish > > as you get older? > A. Charley Weaver : > > My sense of decency. > > > > Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words > > to say "I Love You"? > A. Vincent Price : > > No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty. > > > > > > > > Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and > > "I Can't Get Enough"? > A. George Gobel: > > I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment. > > > > > > > > > > Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture > > more or less with your hands while talking? > A. Rose Marie : > > You ask me one more growing old question Peter, > > and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget. > > > > Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. > > > > Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. > > Are you going to get any during the first year? > A. Charley Weaver : > > Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries. > > > Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score? > A. Rose Marie : > > Ralph, the pin boy. > > > Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss > > two subjects at nudist camps. > > One is politics, what is the other? > A. Paul Lynde : Tape measures. > > > Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the > > bedroom or in the closet? > A. Rose Marie : > > Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom. > > > Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls? > A. Marty Allen : > > Only after lights out. > > > > > > Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will > > wag his tail. What will a goose do? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Make him bark? > > > > Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what > > would you give birth to? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. > > > > Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything > > wrong with getting into the habit of kissing > > a lot of people? > A. Charley Weaver : > > It got me out of the army. > > > > Q. It is the most abused and neglected part > > of your body, what is it? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected. > > > > Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa > > put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do? > A. George Gobel: > > Get it in his mouth. > > > > Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, > > your wife or your elephant? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Who told you about my elephant? > > > > Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible > > for its sex? > A. Charley Weaver : > > I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him. > > > > Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly > > believes in them and has actually seen them on at > > least two occasions. What are they? > A. Charley Weaver : > > His feet. > > > > Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things > > you should never do in bed? > A. Paul Lynde : > > Point and laugh. |
Rainman
| Posted on Wednesday, May 23, 2007 - 10:32 pm: |
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I loved that show. |
Dano_12s
| Posted on Thursday, May 24, 2007 - 08:22 am: |
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Classic funny show! |
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