| Author | Message | ||
     Mikej |
edit: " the preceeding advertisement was moved to the "links" section of the board "  This commercial was brought to you by Tmuzzillo, aka: Anthony Muzzillo . You've seen his work on Saturday morning infomercials and probably recognize his voice or scripting from your workday morning drive-time commute. Yes sir ee Bob! You too can have this unique item if you act now, there's only 15 seconds left on the promotion so hurry up before this Blue Light Special is gone. And for the first fifteen callers he'll even throw in a one-of-a-kind butter knife that also works as a peanut butter or jam spreader as well, and wait it also works as a gasket scraper too. 'scuse me now I've got a call to make.  (Message edited by mikej on July 07, 2005) | ||
| Henrik |
"it slices, it dices, it makes 1000's of julienne fries ..." Henrik | ||
| 99buellx1 |
Well, at least he made it sound unrehearsed.  | ||
| Spiderman |
Next from BikeCo the Bling King AKA the Bedazzler  | ||
| Hattori_hanzo |
Cue Monty Python: SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM...SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM... | ||
| Fullpower |
poser | ||
| Henrik |
From Tom Waits; Step Right Up Step right up step right up step right up Everyone's a winner, bargains galore That's right, you too can be the proud owner Of the quality goes in before the name goes on One-tenth of a dollar one-tenth of a dollar we got service after sales You need perfume? we got perfume how 'bout an engagement ring? Something for the little lady something for the little lady Something for the little lady, hmm Three for a dollar We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale And a smoke-damaged furniture you can drive it away today Act now, act now and receive as our gift, our gift to you They come in all colors, one size fits all No muss, no fuss, no spills you're tired of kitchen drudgery Everything must go going out of business going out of business Going out of business sale Fifty percent off original retail price skip the middle man Don't settle for less How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate Don't be caught with your drawers down Don't be caught with your drawers down You can step right up, step right up That's right, it filets, it chops It dices, slices, never stops lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school It gets rid of unwanted facial hair it gets rid of embarrassing age spots It delivers a pizza and it lengthens, and it strengthens And it finds that slipper that's been at large under the chaise longe for several weeks And it plays a mean Rhythm Master It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar And it's only a dollar, step right up it's only a dollar, step right up 'Cause it forges your signature. If not completely satisfied mail back unused portion of product For complete refund of price of purchase Step right up Please allow thirty days for delivery don't be fooled by cheap imitations You can live in it, live in it laugh in it, love in it Swim in it, sleep in it Live in it, swim in it laugh in it, love in it Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets that's right And it entertains visiting relatives it turns a sandwich into a banquet Tired of being the life of the party? Change your shorts change your life change your life Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy get rid of your wife And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack see you later alligator See you later alligator And it steals your car It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking It's a friend, and it's a companion And it's the only product you will ever need Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing Well it takes weights off hips, bust thighs, chin, midriff Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job it is a job And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange And it gives you denture breath And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion And it gets rid of your traveler's checks It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned Well it takes care of business never needs winding Never needs winding never needs winding Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon 'Cause it's effective, it's defective it creates household odors It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection It gives you an erection it wins the election Why put up with painful corns any longer? It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation no salesman will visit your home We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed How do we do it how do we do it how do we do it how do we do it We need your business we're going out of business We'll give you the business Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale Receive our free brochure, free brochure Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions batteries not included Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available Step right up step right up step right up You got it buddy: the large print giveth and the small print taketh away Step right up you can step right up you can step right up C'mon step right up (Get away from me kid, you bother me...) Step right up, step right up, step right up c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon Step right up you can step right up c'mon and step right up C'mon and step right up | ||
| X1tx |
Better than advertising the Popeel Pocket Pool Cue Stick......  | ||
| Bomber |
Snake Oil (Steve Earle) Ladies and gentlemen, attention please Come in close so everyone can see I got a tale to tell A listen don't cost a dime And if you believe that we're gonna get along just fine Now I've been travelin' all around I heard trouble's come to your town Well I've got a little somethin' Guaranteed to ease your mind It's call Snake Oil y'all It's been around for a long, long time Say, your crops'll burn if it don't rain soon Ain't seen a drop since the tenth of June Well I can open up the sky People never fear If you ain't impressed yet, just tell me what you wanna hear Well you lost your farm so you moved to town You get a job, they shut the factory down Now you sit around all day long feelin' sad and blue You need Snake Oil y'all, tell you what I'm gonna do I can heal the sick, I can mend the lame And the blind shall see again, it's all the same | ||
| Midknyte |
So why is this post still here? | ||
| Mikej |
Folks are having too much fun with it.  The poster has exactly 1 post so far and most likely will never return. Just another drive-by posting on the web. He did leave a live contact link, don't know if it's to a valid email address though, maybe we should invite him back. | ||
| Road_thing |
Mid: Entertainment value, I guess. It's not obvious that Tmuzzillo is affiliated with the neon guys, but he does go on about the kit, doesn't he? That's his only post since joining BWB--makes you wonder if he's on commission... Still, there's no smoking gun that would make me delete his post. rt (the kindler, gentler custodian) | ||
| Mikej |
No smoking gun perhaps, but there is the little .25acp spent casing over on the edge of the sewer grate there: "Just type “thestorm” in the discount box when you are ready to order." | ||
| Blake |
I moved the opening post to the Links page. | ||
| Mikej |
Great, now it looks like I started this thread.  |
