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Buellifer
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 02:55 am: |
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On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting they began to wonder, could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter arrived they asked him if they could get married in Heaven, St. Peter said, I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked Let me go find out, and he left. The couple sat and waited for an answer ... for a couple of months. While they waited, they discussed the pros and cons. If they were allowed to get married in Heaven, should they get married, what with the eternal aspect of it all? What if it doesn't work? Are we stuck in Heaven together forever? Another month passed. St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled. Yes, he informed the couple, You can get married in Heaven. "Great!" said the couple. But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven? St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard on the ground. "What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple. "Oh, Come On!" St. Peter shouted. "It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it'll take to find a lawyer?" |
Ridenusa4l
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 05:22 am: |
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hahahahaha touche sir, thats pretty dang funny! :P Jake |
Crusty
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 06:12 am: |
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I got a new stick deodorant today. The instructions said: Remove cap and push up bottom. I can barely walk, but whenever I fart the room smells lovely. |
Fahren
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 10:12 am: |
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Two guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked. |
86129squids
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 10:21 am: |
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A baby seal walks into a club... |
Crusty
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 10:52 am: |
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A Termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the Bar tender here?" |
Hootowl
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 11:07 am: |
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A skeleton walk in to a bar and orders a beer and a mop. |
Andymnelson
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 11:09 am: |
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I walked into a thread full of bad jokes... |
Slaughter
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 02:54 pm: |
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So a priest, rabbi, Buddhist monk and an alligator walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Hey, what is this, a JOKE?!" |
Strokizator
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 04:50 pm: |
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Here's one for your kids. A mushroom walks into a bar and takes a seat. The bartender tells him "Get out of here. We don't serve your kind". The mushroom asks "Why not? I'm a fungi." |
Mtjm2
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 04:59 pm: |
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A horse walks into a bar . Bartender asks , why the long face ! |
Jumbo_petite
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 05:08 pm: |
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A grasshopper walks into a bar. the bartender says hey we got a drink named after you. The grasshopper says OH!! you got a drink named Steve? |
Preybird1
| Posted on Wednesday, August 24, 2011 - 05:10 pm: |
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So this woman goes to a sex therapist and tells the therapist that she wants to have more sex with her husband because he is not as interested as she is in the idea. So she asks if there is something should give her that would make her husband horny. The therapist say yes as a matter of fact i have these pills that do just that. So she goes home and during dinner she slips her husband some of the pills in his dinner. They had great long sex. So the next night she slipps in more pills and they have good sex and longer this time. by the 3rd day the woman is really horny so she says screw it and dumps the rest of the pills into his dinner and...........The next morning a little boy shows up at the therapist office mommy is dead, sister is pregnant, My but hurts and daddy is out calling here kitty kitty! |
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