| Author | Message | ||
     86129squids |
Listen to yer ma. | ||
| Mueller |
If you lend someone $20 and never see them again, it was probably worth it. | ||
| Danger_dave |
Experience is a good school but the fees are high. The man in the world who is richest...is the one with the most money. Life is like a crap sandwich - the more bread you have - the less crap you eat. A Smith and Wesson beats 4 Aces. | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Don't get lost or killed. Always wear boots. If you can get her laughing, you're halfway there. (Dad's advice on the girlies.) | ||
| Ratbuell |
Main Entry: in·san·i·ty Pronunciation: \in-ˈsa-nə-tē\ Function: noun The act of doing the same thing, over and over again, and expecting different results. | ||
| Hr_puffinstuff |
At first you don't succeed, try, try again... but then take a break, 'cause there's no point in making an ass of yourself. | ||
| Sleez |
never put your @#$% where you wouldn't put your tongue!! | ||
| Etennuly |
Mom always said "put on clean underwear before you go out, you never know if you are going to have an accident". Well that advice is negated as age creeps up! The most common accidents that happen now a days, well.....lets say, it would not matter if they were clean before the accident! | ||
| 86129squids |
Ummm, TMI vern...  On a similar note... "Even if I could utter a wise word, the hearing of which would guarantee you instant enlightenment, it would still be like throwing shit on your heads." Wu-men | ||
| Tom_b |
A parent is only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins the Nobel prize, but the other one gets rolled by a hooker, YOU FAILED.. | ||
| Tom_b |
Don't mess with a man who sleeps with a woman he never has sex with.. They a VERY unpredictable. | ||
| Zane |
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed. Never underestimate the power of human stupidity! A “critic” is a man who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to judge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased—he hates all creative, people equally. A ••••• should be judged by the same criteria as other, professionals offering services for pay--such as dentists, lawyers, hairdressers, physicians, plumbers, etc. Is she professionally competent? Does she give good measure? Is she honest with her clients? It is possible that the percentage of honest and competent whores is higher than that of plumbers and much higher than that of lawyers. And enormously higher than that of professors. Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again Never try to teach a pig to sing- it wastes your time and annoys the pig RAH | ||
| Fast1075 |
I got a good one... here it comes..... almost there...... GITTER DUN!!!!!! | ||
| 86129squids |
"To enter ones own self, it is necessary to go armed to the teeth." Paul Valery | ||
| Danger_dave |
If at first you don't succeed - so much for skydiving. | ||
| Brumbear |
If my aunt had balls she'd be my uncle | ||
| Danger_dave |
Paul Valery was a dick | ||
| Boogiman1981 |
my mother to the judge a quote from a very very good friend of mine "fair is what you pay to get on the bus." | ||
| 86129squids |
"Paul Valery was a dick" GREAT advice, DD...  | ||
| 86129squids |
"One of the elders said: Either fly as far as you can from men, or else, laughing at the world and the men who are in it, make yourself a fool in many things." Thomas Merton | ||
| Danger_dave |
Advice is worth what you paid for it. | ||
| Brumbear |
If my uncle had tits he'd be my aunt  | ||
| Danger_dave |
Keep away from Brumbear's uncle. | ||
| Daveswan |
Wisdom from a drunk uncle Roy: It's not the face you're f***ing, It's the f***er you're facing.  | ||
| Bobh |
Good, cheap, or fast. Pick any two. | ||
| Brumbear |
If your holding your thumb and pissing yer trousers yer there | ||
| 86129squids |
"Good, cheap, or fast. Pick any two." +1, so true. | ||
| Finmars |
Don't run with scissors. | ||
| 86129squids |
"It takes a certain maturity of mind to accept that nature works as steadily in rust as in roses." Esther Warner Dendel | ||
| Swordsman |
Probably already posted: "Wish in one hand, sh!t in the other, and see which one fills up the fastest." ~my Dad ~SM |
