| Author | Message | ||
     Hex |
I'm turning to my BadWeB brothers and sisters--consulting the Oracle so to speak. My sibling is having difficulties and refuses to seek professional assistance. My dad did the exact thing to me and my mother, refused to see a doctor, and ended up dead two month later, 60 years young. Yesterday I had the Sheriff come over to see if he could influence my sibling's situation. My nephew (21), my mother and I made the decision to reach out-now I can't stop until I'm called off the responsibility by proper authority. The sheriff said to me before interviewing her that he would try to work within the frame work of the law to help our family out. She of course turned on the shine, and being no apparent physical threat to herself, the rest of us, or our property, they couldn't take her to be properly evaluated. And she still refuses to go. Symptoms have been showing for a couple years, and getting worse: Age 41 Female 6'2" 250lbs Separated from husband for almost a year now (we shipped him back to Scotland at her request) dementia, hallucinations, irregular to nonexistent sleeping patterns, denial, verbal combativeness, lives in a roomful of self-help books, ankles an feet swollen beyond recognition, lack of apetite,eyes look clear bright and right, hands not shaky. At first I thought she was on meth, but now I believe she is having heart problems which are affecting her mental stability. Maybe just like my dad, but I'm not a doctor. Any ideas, experience, insight, and support, now that I have begun this intervention, would be appreciated. She has gone away for the weekend, disowning me for calling the cops. When she returns I'm thinking of calling the paramedics to come to our house to check her out. I don't care what it costs, I'm not going to let her run away, curl up, and die. Hex | ||
| Cityxslicker |
Bipolar ? some of those meds (or lack ther of) will shut down your thyroid and give you a chemical imbalance that packs on the pounds. Add to it you feel self defeatist attitude to motivate and you get a spiral of apathy, lethargy, entrophy, and over eating. * I am NOT a healthcare provider, your best bet is clinical intervention. Just telling you what I have seen. | ||
| Buellinachinashop |
I'm sorry to hear this Hex. In Wisconsin it must be shown that the person is incapable of taking care of themselves or is a danger to themselves before you can "3 party" them into state care. If I were you, if you haven't done so already, consult a "family" attorney first. Find out what what her rights are before going further. | ||
| Froggy |
I am no doctor, but many of those symptoms are the same that I had when I was going through depression. She needs to get some kind of help, at least to figure out what it is. | ||
| Whatever |
Hex, PM me, I have a ton of experience in this area, but it would better be a private conversation... I do have an idea of what you are dealing with... but she needs some serious help and you all probably need to do an intervention, that is with a Psychiatrist... Charlotte (Message edited by Whatever on December 17, 2009) | ||
| Court |
I'm not sure I am of much help but I'm going to share two personal observations. 1) You've made a HUGE step by asking for help. 2) My Mother has always observed that we should take the same care of our mental health that we do of our physical help. I admire you for seeking help and hope you get a good outcome. Court | ||
| Dsmitty25 |
Sorry to hear Hex "In Wisconsin it must be shown that the person is incapable of taking care of themselves or is a danger to themselves before you can "3 party" them into state care. If I were you, if you haven't done so already, consult a "family" attorney first. Find out what what her rights are before going further." I agree with this. I live in Illinois and have been through this kind of situation with my mother. She along with mental illness is physicaly handycaped from a car wreck we were in. We almost had to do the same thing ei. have her found not fit to care for herself before we would have been able to force her into rehab. Lucky we were able to coax her to go. She isn't 100% better but she has made much progress. Shes a different person that what I'm remember. So there is hope.. Best wishes | ||
| 12x9sl |
Hex, Sorry to hear about your situation. Sounds like you are getting some good advice. In our case, we were best helped by proper counseling (with a shrink, separately and together), meds and physical exercise (which would help the swollen ankles and feet, and has a mental benefit as well). YMMV. +1 on Court's #1 observation. Wishing you all the best, Jon and Shanda | ||
| Ulywife |
Hex, While it may be an uphill battle, it will be well worth it in the end. Fight for her while she is unable to fight for herself. Best of luck with your sister and getting her the proper help. | ||
| Spatten1 |
Fight for her while she is unable to fight for herself Yeah, it's going to be tough. I'm no pro, but my family is riddled with "issues". You just have to keep showing that she has support and a loving caring place to return to. She may lash out at those that love her most, because deep down she knows that they will stick by her. The advice for professional help is right on. Sorry dude. This motivates me to make a telephone call to someone close right now... | ||
| Hex |
Thank you all for the input. Charlotte pm sent. Cityx you have given me a great lead. Hypothyroidism causes all these symptoms that she exhibits. 1 in 8 women have it. I pray that this, the simplest answer, is correct. I need her to get her blood work done. I'm not going to go further here in public for her privacy's sake. I'm focused, willing and on task. You guys are great. Hex | ||
| Red_chili |
Former licensed counselor. You gotta respect her right to choose, even badly- it's a dignity thing. HOWEVER... in the case of diminished capacity that line moves. +1 on the family lawyer suggestion, you may be able to have her declared incompetent (I believe, even temporarily) and a danger to herself or others; that changes things. I believe the sheriff may have been a bit negligent on the 'danger to herself' end of things by your description, but I was not there. But do read that twice: it is harsh. If she recovers and also recovers her capacity to think it through rationally, she may thank you. Or she may not. And if you save her life you may not care either way. But try to take whatever path preserves her dignity over 'caretaking'. Tough navigating that one. You are in my prayers. |
