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Metalstorm
Posted on Sunday, February 25, 2007 - 02:47 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I just had to share this e-mail I received. It's hilarious.

Date: 2007-02-21, 1:51PM

Please help!! After two long years of being on a waiting list for an agility dog (flyball dog, disc dog, etc > insert dog sport of choice), we have been notified by the breeder that, at long last, our number has come up and ... WE ARE HAVING A PUPPY!!

We must get rid of our children IMMEDIATELY because we just know how time consuming our new little puppy is going to be and it just wouldn't be fair to the children. Since our little puppy will be arriving on Monday we MUST place the children into rescue this weekend.

They are described as:

One male - His name is Tommy, Caucasian (English/Irish mix), light blonde hair, blue eyes. Four years old. Excellent disposition. He doesn't bite. Temperament tested. Does have problems with peeing directly in the toilet. Has had Chicken Pox and is current on all shots. Tonsils have already been removed. Tommy eats everything, is very clean, house trained & gets along well with others. Does not run with scissors and with a little training he should be able to read soon.

One female - her name is Lexie, Caucasian (English/Irish mix), strawberry blonde hair, green eyes, quite freckled. Two years old. Can be surly at times. Almost non-biter (may be protective of her toys), thumb sucker. Has been temperament tested but needs a little attitude adjusting occasionally. She is current on all shots, tonsils out, is very healthy, and can be affectionate. Gets along well with other little girls & little boys but does not like to share her toys and would therefore do best in a one-child household. She is a very quick learner and is currently working on her house training - shouldn't take long at all.

We really do LOVE our children so much and want to do what's right for them; that is why we contacted a rescue group. But we simply can no longer keep them. Also, we are afraid that they may hurt our new puppy.

I hope you understand that ours is a UNIQUE situation and we have a real emergency here!! They MUST be placed in rescue by Sunday night at the latest, or we will be forced to drop them off at the orphanage or along some dark, country road. That would break our heart, but our priority now has to be our new puppy.
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Danger_dave
Posted on Sunday, February 25, 2007 - 03:00 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Nice.

My wife of 25 years, 'The Co-pilot', and I have always maintained that we should never split because the custody battle would be horrendous.

You take them
F*** no - you take them.
Bull, they're yours
they're yours too
you take em
no way you take 'em.
yours

etc etc etc
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