| Author | Message | ||
     Tramp |
Subject: Blond Year in Review January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won`t fit in typewriter!!! March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!" April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!! May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won`t fit into those little packets!!! June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn`t find a lake with a slope. July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!! August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down. September - The capital of California is "C".....isn`t it??? October - Hate M &M`s.....they are so hard to peel. November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!! December - Couldn`t call 911....."duh".....there`s no "eleven" button on the phone!!! What a year!! | ||
| Brotherbuell |
 I'm dying to send this to my wife but I'm afraid she'll send all my Buell presents back. | ||
| Buellin_ri |
 | ||
| Gowindward |
My blonde wife, is driving her car and the interior lights keep going on and off, and the door chime keeps chiming. Something must be seriously wrong with the car. Calls me to see if she should take it in to a shop before she is stranded with a car that won't run. "Dear is the "door ajar" light on in the dash?" DUH!!! I still love her. | ||
| Slaughter |
Do the emergency blinkers work? Yes... No... Yes... No... Yes... No... Yes... No... Yes... | ||
| Light_keeper |
It's not a jar it's a door! I guess you people just don't get it.   | ||
| Buell12hundo |
where do I find blinker fluid my left turn thingee seems to be out | ||
| No_rice |
three blondes were walking in the woods when they came upon some tracks. they stopped and the first one said "i think its a rabbit". second one said "no, i think its a deer. third one stood there contemplating it for a minute, and just as she was about to speak they all got hit by the train. | ||
| Seth |
 | ||
| Philip |
what do you call a blond skeleton in a closet? hide and seek champion 1968. | ||
| Garrett1998s1 |
What do you call a smart blonde? A yellow lab | ||
| CJXB |
 | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
CJ I don't think of you as blonde, sorta light chestnut.  | ||
| CJXB |
Sorta light chestnut, hmmm that would be cool wonder if my hair salon has that color !! Actually it's highlighted blonde now since you saw me last, but not actual blonde !! I just wanted to be "grumpy", haha get it grumpy, I kill me !! CJ  | ||
| Bomber |
I used to be blond -- does THAT count? | ||
| CJXB |
Uuhhh yea, cause you are a real blonde inside bomber, nothing to do with you hair color !! | ||
| Bomber |
such a funny girrrrrrrl you are, Ceej! I gotta go get a new bottle of white out for my screen | ||
| CJXB |
LOL, just giving you crap bomber, you're actually very wise !! | ||
| Bomber |
shhhhh -- don't raise expectations TOO high, girl sides, if you didn't give me a ration from time to time, I'd think you didn't like me anymore ;-} | ||
| U4euh |
If you find any of these remotely amusing, your not blonde. I let the blonde in the family read them, and she said "I don't get it, what is so funny?" Poor child'omine!! | ||
| Leftcoastal |
I've learned to translate the jokes into 'blonde' for my wife (Yup - a blonde!) so she'll get them. 26 (Jeeze - coming up on 27!) years and I can speak, read, even write in fluent blonde. If any of you need translation services, you can email me - I'll give you special BadWeb rates! AL | ||
| Kevinfromwebb |
Saw this on a bumper sticker the other day, not exactly blonde but close... 'My Labrador Retriever is smarter than your Honor Student' I thought it was great... Kevin |
